Tuesday, October 20, 2009

That you spent your change over...

Jump in your Range Rover
Turn up the AC
And then explain to the children
Why little ducklings they don't see
Or why those white bears from up north
Are dealing legalized cocaine
But aren't legally living free-range.
Your tailpipe is our future
And you treat us with disregard
Take your children to see the glaciers
So they can tell your grandkids all about it
They will require some imagination
An quite possibly ventilation
But at least they'll hear about it
And know where the guilt is to be laid.
Hide your children from me
Shunt them to the water
You can't tell it's set to boil
Just slowly getting warmer
You will burn our feet
And choke the air.
I walk into my house
Wipe the soot from my eyes
Clear a spot in the window
Watch you run out your door
Back to your pride and joy
Roving the cement range
While our children beg for organics
And less acid in the rain.
We all learned to share
But I'd prefer if you'd keep your bad air.
I'll stand here starring
At your dog's shit upon the pavement
Love the smell of methane
Frying on the sidewalk
No kids don't eat it
We'll eat shit soon enough
We love sunny days in November
And don't forget those white flakes
Out in the desert.

But for now we'll just agree
On all the same lies.

Tuesday, October 13, 2009

It's only been as long as my last oil change...

Ok ok, so my sister convinced me to start blogging again. Ask and ye shall receive.

I'm not quite sure what there is to blog about...life? Work? Love? News? Or just my random-ness (see previous blog posting)? How about I touch on a little of everything...

Life:

Wake up, take a shower, eat breakfast while watching Charmed, drive to work, work which consists of looking up phone numbers, cold calling and updating contact information, eat lunch, more work sometimes sprinkled with filing, printing checks and trips to the bank, drive home while talking to the Mothership, spending the evening with the wifey watching TV, eating dinner and talking forever about anything and everything. Life is good.

Work:

Despite how exciting I'm sure I made it sound above, I actually really enjoy work. My office is so laid back that afternoons are usually accompanied by ping-pong games and the office is full of dogs and babies. Recently a guy at my office created quite a stir when he thought he was sending an e-mail to his friend detailing the various women he is dating and his sexual exploits (including a bi-lingual threesome and a lady with one arm) when the actual receipent and one of our clients called in a rage demanding an apology to his entire company. Apparently the e-mail was forwarded to everyone. How was the purpotrator punished? I'm pretty sure he's on an all expense paid, company funded trip to Las Vegas...

Love:

All is going great in love for this quarter-century Libra. Andy and my one year anniversary is this Saturday. We haven't really made any plans, I guess we'll see how her schedule for work turns out. I haven't gotten her anything either...I'm sort of at a loss, but I'm sure I'll come up with something.

News:

Looks like we spent a bagillion dollars for nothing in our attack on the moon.

Random-ness:

Believe it or not, you can trip down the stairs and get rug burn on your entire shin...don't ask me how, but I did it and have the marks to prove it.

And for now, that is all...

Peace, love and boy scouts popcorn!

Wednesday, January 14, 2009

Settle a Sneezing Civilization

"Ahhhh Chuu"

A sneeze.

A common, unconcious reaction to something irritating your nose and or throat and or other parts of your insides I don't know the name of.

I just shot spit on my arm and into the air. Imagine what my germ-aphobe of an OCD cubemate would think of that!

::Praying the spit dust settles before he comes back:: "Setttle spit, settle" I whisper in the direction of my silence-breaking sneeze...well post-sneeze actually.

Speaking of settling...ever play Civilization? (Settling made me think of settler...I dunno...)

I was addicted! Freshman year of college my roommate, Sally (short for Sarah), and I use to stay up all night playing. Not playing each other. Playing our individual games on our individual computers, waving goodbye to our hallmates as they ventured out onto the frozen tundra in short skirts and tubetops covered up by sheer shawls.

"Don't mind us ladies. We're conquiring nations and developing technology. I'll keep my fingers crossed that you beat your all-time kegstand score!"

"Shhhhhh" Don't mention the sneeze. He's coming!! I don't want to hear a peep, least of all anything resembling "Bless you!"

"WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY??"

"Blast Sue?"

"Who the hell is Sue?"

"Good question!" ::runs and hides::

"Hide my spit while you're at it!"